You might have a small church if..........

Twisted said:
16KJV11 said:
Twisted said:
...the church fridge has bags filled with sauce packs from multiple fast food joints.
Hey, wait a minute...

.....this is your church fridge.

Haier-HCR17W-1.7-Cubic-Foot-Dorm-Refrigerator.jpg
No, this one is!
icebox.jpg
 
....this person is the only one qualified to be a Deacon.

C5zxvh9WYAAT_jl.jpg
 
For the Lord's Supper, you use off-brand crackers and grape juice from Walmart

Abundant life Assemblies of God  March 5, 2017.
 
Baptist City Holdout said:
YMHASC if. half the announcements are a recap of what went on in the Trump Administration during the last week.

ALL size churches should do that.  Christians are extremely ignorant of their government.
 
...all your members and staff are midgets.
 
Vince Massi said:
Twisted said:
...all your members and staff are midgets.

What staff?

Grace Independent Baptist Church 1970

Didn't have a pastor?  Now that IS small.
 
Well, Yeah, we had a pastor, but no one else. Even the janitor work was done by volunteers.
 
YMHSCI

They let me keep a frozen turkey in the church refrigerator.


Try that at FBCH.
 
You might have a small church if..........

you arrive 5 minutes early & other than the pastor you are the 1st to arrive for services.
 
fishinnut said:
You might have a small church if..........

you arrive 5 minutes early & other than the pastor you are the 1st to arrive for services.

Make it twenty minutes, and you're describing my church.

But we did have a fascinating service today before the police arrived.
 
fishinnut said:
You might have a small church if..........

you arrive 5 minutes early & other than the pastor you are the 1st to arrive for services.

....you arrive at church before it starts, the doors are locked, and the pastor shows up AFTER the time the service starts.
 
The pastor is paid with vegetable from the member's garden.

True story.  I had to learn to like squash.
 
A neighbor's hog greets people as they walk up to the church.  The church folk are happy to see it and know it by name, pet it and consider making it a member because it is more faithful than most of the other members.

(True Story)
 
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