You might have a small church if..........

In winter, you have to arrive early to stoke the fire.
 
Folks drive their lawn tractor to church.

(True Story)
 
So - I am posting all true stories.  Been in so many small churches....
 
The published church phone number is actually the pastor's home number.
 
Binaca Chugger said:
The published church phone number is actually the pastor's home number.
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Well, Yeah, that's normal in a small church.



You have more pews than members.

They had a church split years after I went off to HAC. I was visiting my parents and went there one Sunday, and they literally did have more pews than attenders.
 
You might have a small church if..........

the pastor after praying for God's provision................goes fishing.......................to feed his family.
 
YMHASC if..............

the name of the church is the Hyles Baptist Church.
 
RAIDER said:
YMHASC if..............

the name of the church is the Hyles Baptist Church.
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And there are 2 members of the pastoral staff who hold honorary DR degrees from HAC....given by JS.
 
fishinnut said:
RAIDER said:
YMHASC if..............

the name of the church is the Hyles Baptist Church.
Click to expand...

And there are 2 members of the pastoral staff who hold honorary DR degrees from HAC....given by JS.
Click to expand...

:)
 
You might have a small church if..........

you have a workers appreciation dinner & a table for 6 works.
 
RAIDER said:
fishinnut said:
RAIDER said:
YMHASC if..............

the name of the church is the Hyles Baptist Church.
Click to expand...

And there are 2 members of the pastoral staff who hold honorary DR degrees from HAC....given by JS.
Click to expand...

:)
Click to expand...
And they both were awarded "Who's Who" and Mr. Hylander
 
...the four you just baptized have to change clothes in the same cubicle.
 
fishinnut said:
You might have a small church if..........

instead of a bus route, there is a van route.
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Well, Yeah, but it's grown into three vans!

Abundant Life Assemblies of God
 
As a church activity, everyone walks three hundred feet to the ice cream stand and everybody buys a cone.

Abundant Life Assemblies of God
 
Twisted said:
...the four you just baptized have to change clothes in the same cubicle.
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And use the same modesty robe!
 
RAIDER said:
Twisted said:
...the four you just baptized have to change clothes in the same cubicle.
Click to expand...

And use the same modesty robe!
Click to expand...

surprised-face.jpg
 
When your baby outgrows his car seat, you donate it to the church so the other baby can use it.
 
Vince Massi said:
When your baby outgrows his car seat, you donate it to the church so the other baby can use it.
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That's actually funny! 

But does having 2 small infants at the same time still mean its a small church?
 
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