You might have a small church if..........

[RAIDER]

.....the nursery director, SS superintendent, janitor, and pastor's wife are all the same person.

 

[tobytyler]

.......each individual pew was paid for by a church member in 1964.  Their name is on a small golden plate on the end of each pew.

That was at FBC Hammond in the church built after the fire and before the expansion that now is Hyles Memorial Auditorium.





Are these pews still being used throughout FBC's other buildings?  I know that they were in the buildings on State Street, but with all of the renovations, they be no longer on FBC property.  These pews were the hardest?.I remember there was an old lady at FBC in the early 70's named Mrs Redepenny.  She was in her 90's and she always marked her seat on the wooden pews with a pillow that she always had to sit on.  I also wonder where the huge cross that was in the baptistery went to??when FBC doubled the auditorium, they removed the cross and put a huge red drapery/curtain over the baptistery.

 

[LongGone]

The entire congregation fellowships in the pastors living room after the evening service.

 

[Vince Massi]

Grace Independent Baptist Church, which hit eighty in attendance on a good Sunday, was very kind to me when I was newly saved. We had a church building, but no pews. Then one day, we bought pews.

The pastor was so happy sitting in a pew on Wednesday night, that he asked that we not go off into separate rooms to pray,l but that we all pray in the pews. He looked so happy sitting in a pew that we all agreed.

 

[Smellin Coffee]

....if you have a cemetery in the back yard of the church.

...and the pastor's guard dog (because he can't afford a personal body guard) is the only body buried there.

 

[prophet]

....guest preachers give YOU a love offering.

I did this as an evangelist.

God bless those who faithfully minister in lowly small places.

Same

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[prophet]

.......each individual pew was paid for by a church member in 1964.  Their name is on a small golden plate on the end of each pew.

That was at FBC Hammond in the church built after the fire and before the expansion that now is Hyles Memorial Auditorium.

??

Talk about missing the point.

YMBAH if........ 

Take it easy on Rainman.

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[prophet]

The entire congregation fellowships in the pastors living room after the evening service.

That's because the Sanctuary IS his living  room...after the evening service.

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[prophet]

YMHASCif...
A special number requires half of the congregation.

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[prophet]

if...
You have to step over the Pastor's dog to walk the aisle

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[prophet]

if...
The Pastor's tooth brush and paste are next to the hand sanitizer in the Restroom.

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[prophet]

The attatched parsonage is the nursery

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[prophet]

Everyone has a church coat that stays on the rack .

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[prophet]

Your Church Bible is in your seat all week.

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[fishinnut]

You might have a small church if..........

during the hand shaking time of the service, everyone shakes hamds with everyone, even though they had already done so before the service began.

 

[prophet]

You get taters from the church root cellar after the service, "cuz Paw been outta work all winter".

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[prophet]

You might have a small church if..........

during the hand shaking time of the service, everyone shakes hamds with everyone, even though they had already done so before the service began.

3 minutes ago...

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[prophet]

Morning announcements include updates on pastor's goats

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[prophet]

The prayer list only changes when someone dies.

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[prophet]

Everyone talks through the opening greeting and announcements, cuz they all have em memorized.

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