This will be a very brief (because I could really write a lot about what I perceive you to be saying

) synopsis of my thoughts.
You certainly rightly do have a decent basis of foundational doctrinal truth that you have intellectually learned, and much of what you cite is fundamental in nature, as well as accurately conveyed as to what the Bible teaches (about many of the things you reference), but it appears (again, my perception could be off and I might be misunderstanding your intent in meaning) that you have some concepts that are a bit off (no offense, again, just my perception of your theological understanding and emphasis in some important areas).
First, you take exception with what you perceive to be my adherence to what you call "Orthodox Christianity". My guess is that you believe that somehow this adherence violates what Scripture actually teaches, and that I am making my conscience subservient to the expected conformity by some ecclesiastical ("religious" for a more relatable general term) body. While there is an element of truth to the fact that where our individual (possibly novel and odd) interpretations should be checked or validated by some source outside our own potentially biased understanding/beliefs, at the end of the day, the protestant notion of ultimate authority (Sola Scriptura) is the over-riding premise for what I believe. So "orthodoxy" is VERY big term (too big to try to go into here), but suffice it to say, I think for myself ultimately, and as Luther said when confronted and threatened with death by the Catholic Church... "Thus I cannot and will not recant, because acting against one's conscience is neither safe nor sound. Here I stand;
I can do no other. God help me". So, how does this relate to your post? You implied that there was some contradiction with the idea that I would dare to claim a higher love for the Savior than my wife, but you are creating a conflict that is not even a valid problem within the pale of Orthodox Christian beliefs. It may seem weird to your sense of love, mainly because you don't believe that Christ is the real eternal Son of God. But as I accept that truth, of His personal claims being objectively true, it stands to reason that the One who saved my soul is not at odds with me loving him properly on a higher plane (not merely worshipping Him in some abstract sense). This notion of our relationship with Christ being infinitely more valuable than human relationships is easily attested to in the book of Luke 14:26
If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.
I am eager to address more ideas with the rest of your post, particularly the manner in which you frame your definition of "relationship", but that is enough for now, until and if you desire to go further. Let me leave you with a question to close this point out. You said that I absolutely SHOULD worship Christ, but not love Him more than my wife, and followed that philosophical admonition with the statement that I cannot hear, see, and touch Him (implying that is sufficient rationale for why I shouldn't demean my relationship with the material person of my wife), but if I can't see, feel, or hear Him (a notion that I think is slightly skewed in its understanding, but more on that later if you desire), why should I dare to even worship an entity that I can't "see, feel, or hear"?