Registered sex offenders and church attendance.

[Tarheel Baptist]

Does your church have a policy regarding attendance of registered sex offenders?
A few months ago, we discovered that one was attending our services. He is a 72 year old man convicted of raping a 23 year old (with the mental capacity of a 5 year old) repeatedly over a 12 month period. He served prison time and is now registered and on probation.
Our policy, along with the laws in NC, lead us to ask him NOT to attend services.
Some of our Pastors and Deacons felt remorse over the decision.

Do you have a policy...if not, imo you should...and what does it contain?

 

[Frag]

Our policy:  If they are registered sex offenders, then they CANNOT attend our church.  If we become aware that one has attended, we send a deacon and one of our assistant pastors to to his house to let him know he cannot come back.

I do understand the remorse that is felt.  But we just have too large of a children's ministry to risk an incident.  Also, by allowing a known sex offender to attend, we could face liability issues if something were to happen. 

It is a shame.  There is no doubt those that will not repeat this crime.  But the stats don't lie -- an overwhelming percentage will.  Bottom line -- the safety of our innocent children trumps all.

 

[samspade]

It may also have to do with the terms of their release/probation. Many people on the list are not allowed at facilities with children (schools, day cares, churches). It may be wise to consult the man's probation officer (if he has one) and involve him in the decision. If he's flattened his time and is simply required to register, the prudent path would be to follow the course you did.

One option is for some of the men to go to him and have a Bible study and fellowship time. If he is truly repentant for his actions he won't be insulted by the suggestion.

 

[subllibrm]

One option is for some of the men to go to him and have a Bible study and fellowship time. If he is truly repentant for his actions he won't be insulted by the suggestion.

^this^

He needs to have the fellowship/influence of the church even if he can't participate in the full corporate program. It would be a great opportunity for those select men to exercise grace.

 

[Biker]

We have one registered sex offender, and prior, we had one that attended for a while.
Our church is set up to follow the biblical model for church so we don't offer the opportunities that
allow for them that opportunity to molest.

It would need to take place outside of church. And phoning the probation officer to ensure there are no restrictions to them attending also takes place (if they have one) as samspade indicated. If they need to use the restroom, then they are accompanied by someone.

Our kids are watched by everyone. Scripture doesn't allow us to exclude them, honestly, EVEN if there are legalities which forbid it, it can be worked out. I understand the desire to exclude them, sometimes I feel similarly. Obviously they do not sit near the kids( except if the family sits near them, and they'd be visitors)

I can usually smell them from a mile away. I've been on all sides of the issue so it's quite comfortable for me to have them present BUT...I have no qualms kicking them out if they do not follow the strict guidelines.. We also offer them a one on one home bible study, as others suggested here. alongside our usual weekly study. They need constant monitoring, folks dropping by their home on a regularly scheduled basis. Supporting them, monitoring them, keeps society at large, safe. Just like adultery or any other sex perversion, it is more likely to occur when they are stressed out.

 

[Norefund]

I'm curious. How does a church know a sex offender is attending? People can attend churches for years without joining so I'm not sure how anyone would know.

 

[Castor Muscular]

I'm curious. How does a church know a sex offender is attending? People can attend churches for years without joining so I'm not sure how anyone would know.

Also, how does one register to be a sex offender?  Do you go to the same place where you register to vote?  Is there a background check?  Do you need a license? 

 

[Frag]

I'm curious. How does a church know a sex offender is attending? People can attend churches for years without joining so I'm not sure how anyone would know.

We are in small town, rural America.  Trust me, everyone knows everything about everyone.  My neighbors know things about me that I don't even know!!! 

 

[Tarheel Baptist]

I'm curious. How does a church know a sex offender is attending? People can attend churches for years without joining so I'm not sure how anyone would know.

Obviously, it is possible to have sex offenders attend services and not know it.
In our case, one of our Pastors knew this gentleman and his background.

 

[Tarheel Baptist]

I'm curious. How does a church know a sex offender is attending? People can attend churches for years without joining so I'm not sure how anyone would know.

Also, how does one register to be a sex offender?  Do you go to the same place where you register to vote?  Is there a background check?  Do you need a license?

Be convicted of a sex offense and all those things shall be added unto you....

 

[prophet]

State law thankfully makes the 'hard choices' for us.  For the 1 in 10 who got a bum rap, 9 are reprobates who we can't help.  So we preach the gospel everywhere, but ixnay on the follow up.

Anishinabe

 

[lnf]

I agree with you, aleshanee.  Churches without a specific ministry geared toward sex and other violent offenders, in my opinion, should not knowingly allow that subset of people to attend their services, for the protection (both spiritual and physical) of the congregation. 

I can even agree that, at first blush, that might seem harsh and "unchristianlike", but there will always be more victims than offenders.  Every church is likely to have one or more victims of violent crime among their membership.  Do we count them as less important than a sex offender who wants to attend services?  Like you stated, there are lots of churches who do have specific ministries geared toward their particular needs.  Why not refer them to those ministries...or offer them other off-site options, as some here have already mentioned.       

Perhaps a small community might not already contain a church that has a specific ministry for sex offenders and the like, and that would be a shame for those who truly desire to know God.  I would suggest that those churches consider how they might safely minister to that subset of people, if they feel a burden for it.

 

[FSSL]

I'm curious. How does a church know a sex offender is attending? People can attend churches for years without joining so I'm not sure how anyone would know.

I suggest that for every new visitor, use Google. This worked for us. We got an email from someone who planned to attend. Just Googling the person's name and location brought up newspaper articles.

EVERY church needs to be aware. I have been on staff in large and small churches. In EVERY situation, there was at least one child molester. Sad... very sad! I counseled a child predator for three years... that person was eventually disciplined out.

 

[lnf]

We have one registered sex offender, and prior, we had one that attended for a while.
Our church is set up to follow the biblical model for church so we don't offer the opportunities that
allow for them that opportunity to molest.

It would need to take place outside of church. And phoning the probation officer to ensure there are no restrictions to them attending also takes place (if they have one) as samspade indicated. If they need to use the restroom, then they are accompanied by someone.

Our kids are watched by everyone. Scripture doesn't allow us to exclude them, honestly, EVEN if there are legalities which forbid it, it can be worked out. I understand the desire to exclude them, sometimes I feel similarly. Obviously they do not sit near the kids( except if the family sits near them, and they'd be visitors)

I can usually smell them from a mile away. I've been on all sides of the issue so it's quite comfortable for me to have them present BUT...I have no qualms kicking them out if they do not follow the strict guidelines.. We also offer them a one on one home bible study, as others suggested here. alongside our usual weekly study. They need constant monitoring, folks dropping by their home on a regularly scheduled basis. Supporting them, monitoring them, keeps society at large, safe. Just like adultery or any other sex perversion, it is more likely to occur when they are stressed out.

Biker, I have a few questions regarding this post:

1.  What do you mean about "the biblical model for church" not offering opportunity to molest?
2.  You talk about it taking place "outside the church", but then talk about verifying any restrictions "for attending".  Are you saying that if there are no "probationary" restrictions for attending that your church would allow them to attend, but assign a person to accompany them to the restroom?
3.  You state that the children are watched "by everyone", then state that scripture doesn't allow you to exclude them, even if legalities forbid it.  Are you saying that if legalities forbid it, you would disciple them off-site, but if legalities do not forbid it, that you would assign them a restroom monitor?
4.  You liken "adultery" to "any other sexual perversion".  Do you equate adultery (sex between two consenting adults) to sexual perversion (one example being sex between an adult and a child)?

 

[freelance_christian]

Does your church have a policy regarding attendance of registered sex offenders?
A few months ago, we discovered that one was attending our services. He is a 72 year old man convicted of raping a 23 year old (with the mental capacity of a 5 year old) repeatedly over a 12 month period. He served prison time and is now registered and on probation.
Our policy, along with the laws in NC, lead us to ask him NOT to attend services.
Some of our Pastors and Deacons felt remorse over the decision.

Do you have a policy...if not, imo you should...and what does it contain?

How exactly do you justify this biblically? 1 Corinthians 6 makes it clear that the church is not comprised of just the best of us, but also the worst among us, including the sexually immoral. If this man is repentant then he has the right to fellowship with the church. Granted, the church should have someone monitor this man the entire time he is in attendance, and he would be limited in his capacity to serve in the church, but exclusion is hardly a biblical response to this situation. If he is truly repentant, he will welcome the accountability. He should also have regular contact and accountability with the ministerial staff throughout the week. We had two registered sex offenders in our church, a male and a female, in somewhat regular attendance, and that is how we handled it. Neither of them could bear the constant monitoring and accountability, and they left.

 

[lnf]

Does your church have a policy regarding attendance of registered sex offenders?
A few months ago, we discovered that one was attending our services. He is a 72 year old man convicted of raping a 23 year old (with the mental capacity of a 5 year old) repeatedly over a 12 month period. He served prison time and is now registered and on probation.
Our policy, along with the laws in NC, lead us to ask him NOT to attend services.
Some of our Pastors and Deacons felt remorse over the decision.

Do you have a policy...if not, imo you should...and what does it contain?

How exactly do you justify this biblically? 1 Corinthians 6 makes it clear that the church is not comprised of just the best of us, but also the worst among us, including the sexually immoral. If this man is repentant then he has the right to fellowship with the church. Granted, the church should have someone monitor this man the entire time he is in attendance, and he would be limited in his capacity to serve in the church, but exclusion is hardly a biblical response to this situation. If he is truly repentant, he will welcome the accountability. He should also have regular contact and accountability with the ministerial staff throughout the week. We had two registered sex offenders in our church, a male and a female, in somewhat regular attendance, and that is how we handled it. Neither of them could bear the constant monitoring and accountability, and they left.

freelance christian, that's the rub...constant monitoring and accountability.  Somehow, I doubt that most churches will actually do the follow-through to protect their other members.  Goodness, at my church, we have a hard time getting people to make sure the doors are locked!  Personally, I'd rather stand before my God and explain why I excluded a sexual predator from my church than to explain why I didn't...

 

[ALAYMAN]

How exactly do you justify this biblically? 1 Corinthians 6 makes it clear that the church is not comprised of just the best of us, but also the worst among us, including the sexually immoral. If this man is repentant then he has the right to fellowship with the church. Granted, the church should have someone monitor this man the entire time he is in attendance, and he would be limited in his capacity to serve in the church, but exclusion is hardly a biblical response to this situation. If he is truly repentant, he will welcome the accountability. He should also have regular contact and accountability with the ministerial staff throughout the week. We had two registered sex offenders in our church, a male and a female, in somewhat regular attendance, and that is how we handled it. Neither of them could bear the constant monitoring and accountability, and they left.

And what if having such people amongst former victims causes those wounded/molested people to freak out, lose emotional control, and basically avoid the church for fear of relapses of complete terror when they see that type of person in the worship service?

 

[Biker]

Biker, I have a few questions regarding this post:

1.  What do you mean about "the biblical model for church" not offering opportunity to molest?
I mean we follow the biblical model for the early church. Within a 7 day week, we offer church and a bible study. After church, about once a month, we have potluck. Our Bible studies are segregated and take place in smaller settings, but no children are present. We offer private, one on one Bible studies to anyone who requests it. Children's parties are offered sometimes.
2.  You talk about it taking place "outside the church", but then talk about verifying any restrictions "for attending". We verify whether or not the sex offender is allowed to attend church. Part of that verification process is learning details about the crime. Did they urinate in an abandoned public parking lot at night or did they molest a child? What actually occurred? Did they use a weapon? lots of things to weigh.  Meghans Law is pretty screwed up

3. Are you saying that if there are no "probationary" restrictions for attending that your church would allow them to attend, but assign a person to accompany them to the restroom?
The restrooms are attached to the auditorium. It is where we worship, eat & fellowship. The bathrooms are right inside the aditorium so all can see who enters. It's very easy to memorize who comes in and out. We spread the word on who is dangerous and Expect parents to act accordingly. I also inform, in a gentle way, the children. I cannot fathom it, but some of our parents won't broach the subject with their children.

3.  You state that the children are watched "by everyone", then state that scripture doesn't allow you to exclude them, even if legalities forbid it.  Are you saying that if legalities forbid it, you would disciple them off-site, but if legalities do not forbid it, that you would assign them a restroom monitor? All new visitors are discipled. Anyone who molests a child, and we are aware of it,  will agree to have multiple people watching them at all times.
4.  You liken "adultery" to "any other sexual perversion".  Do you equate adultery (sex between two consenting adults) to sexual perversion (one example being sex between an adult and a child)?
I don't understand the question, sorry. But FTR, We don't follow adulterers around the church. By definition, adulterers are unsaved people involved in adultery

 

[Biker]

I suggest that for every new visitor, use Google. This worked for us. We got an email from someone who planned to attend. Just Googling the person's name and location brought up newspaper articles.

EVERY church needs to be aware. I have been on staff in large and small churches. In EVERY situation, there was at least one child molester. Sad... very sad! I counseled a child predator for three years... that person was eventually disciplined out.

Google is excellent, thanks for the tip. Last one I caught on mugshots.com. They go way back
For whatever reason, he was a serial offender yet NOT required to register anymore. Last crime was over 20 years ago

 

[freelance_christian]

How exactly do you justify this biblically? 1 Corinthians 6 makes it clear that the church is not comprised of just the best of us, but also the worst among us, including the sexually immoral. If this man is repentant then he has the right to fellowship with the church. Granted, the church should have someone monitor this man the entire time he is in attendance, and he would be limited in his capacity to serve in the church, but exclusion is hardly a biblical response to this situation. If he is truly repentant, he will welcome the accountability. He should also have regular contact and accountability with the ministerial staff throughout the week. We had two registered sex offenders in our church, a male and a female, in somewhat regular attendance, and that is how we handled it. Neither of them could bear the constant monitoring and accountability, and they left.

And what if having such people amongst former victims causes those wounded/molested people to freak out, lose emotional control, and basically avoid the church for fear of relapses of complete terror when they see that type of person in the worship service?

There are a thousand and one what if scenarios that we could explore, but I would ask you the same question: On what biblical grounds would you exclude a repentant sex offender from your church? Ministering grace to sinners is dirty work.