It's quite possible that I am missing the whole point of this thread, but here goes...
I believe that our vertical relationship affects our horizontal relationship, which becomes evident in positive ways.
True story...
My son has lots of friends, many of whom are what I call "throwaways". Their parents have either given up on them by kicking them out, or don't really care where they are or what they are doing.
God has given me, through these young people, what I refer to as my "pool table" ministry. Some I find easy to love, others, not so much.
There is one particular young man I have struggled with...he did certain things on my property that actually caused me potential legal liability. When I tried to talk to him about it, he totally discounted my point of view, and rudely, at that! Erg!
I actually know his mother. She's a very personable individual. But she has thrown away this child of hers. Truth be told, he's homeless. Honestly, I've really struggled with how to deal with him. Whenever I saw him on my property, I would actually grimace...and this grieved my spirit. I kept hearing, "if you don't show him the love of Christ, who will?" So I started praying for him...not for our personal relationship...just for him. It took awhile, but there came a day when I no longer grimaced when I saw him...and our relationship started to change. He speaks to me with a smile on his face, with the utmost courtesy. He takes it upon himself to do little chores around here, like pick up blowing trash and broken tree limbs in the yard...so early in the morning that I don't think he always knows when I see him doing it...although I do try to always praise him for his efforts.
One day, I had to ask him to stop doing a certain thing (nothing illegal) because it interfered with my normal routine. He was so totally apologetic about it...even though I wasn't angry. He didn't know he was complicating things for me. I looked him straight in the eye, and told him that it was OK...then he apologized again! I cried tears of joy and thankfulness to God after he walked out of the house.
Honestly, I don't think this particular horizontal relationship would have ever improved, if I didn't treasure my vertical relationship.