Characters of Hacker Folklore

[qwerty]

He dressed like a cowboy? Although that name does not ring a bell.

Mark McCarty is the one I'm thinking of... He was the "call a dog a dog" guy.

I think he and Tom spent a summer or two together?

 

[Still There]

Mike Hensen from LA.  Our family knew him as an acquaintenance from someone else.  Graduated in 85.  We suspicioned he was gay.  He graduated and was never heard from again. 

 

[Fresh Air]

Mark McCarty is the one I'm thinking of... He was the "call a dog a dog" guy.

I think he and Tom spent a summer or two together?

Close, but no cigar. I met him before either one of us went to HAC. I was with Joe Boyd and we held a revival in his home church in Cahokia, IL. The church there had a sincere but overwhelmed pastor, was trying to hang on as a white church in a black neighborhood, and had an old crumbling building with a large and nearly empty auditorium. Somehow this guy had gotten involved, and his highly aggressive and annoying version of amen, such as 'call a dog a dog preacher', wasn't helping that church at all.

In those days, the first day at the new church the next week Joe Boyd would deconstruct the church from the previous week, explaining to us the strengths and weaknesses. He told us the Monday after spending the week in Cahokia that their pastor needed to convince the guy to go to Bible college. It was how you got rid of an overly aggressive problem like that.

Lo, and behold, I show up for my freshman semester a couple of months later and guess what I hear echoing out during the preaching in chapel at HAC? 'Call a dog a dog, preacher!'

...my compliments to Joe Boyd and that pastor. 

 

[RAIDER]

Mark McCarty is the one I'm thinking of... He was the "call a dog a dog" guy.

I think he and Tom spent a summer or two together?

Close, but no cigar. I met him before either one of us went to HAC. I was with Joe Boyd and we held a revival in his home church in Cahokia, IL. The church there had a sincere but overwhelmed pastor, was trying to hang on as a white church in a black neighborhood, and had an old crumbling building with a large and nearly empty auditorium. Somehow this guy had gotten involved, and his highly aggressive and annoying version of amen, such as 'call a dog a dog preacher', wasn't helping that church at all.

In those days, the first day at the new church the next week Joe Boyd would deconstruct the church from the previous week, explaining to us the strengths and weaknesses. He told us the Monday after spending the week in Cahokia that their pastor needed to convince the guy to go to Bible college. It was how you got rid of an overly aggressive problem like that.

Lo, and behold, I show up for my freshman semester a couple of months later and guess what I hear echoing out during the preaching in chapel at HAC? 'Call a dog a dog, preacher!'

...my compliments to Joe Boyd and that pastor. 

Now this is the type stuff for which we are looking!!  Not just a name.  Not just a sentence.  A story behind a name.

 

[RAIDER]

He told us the Monday after spending the week in Cahokia that their pastor needed to convince the guy to go to Bible college. It was how you got rid of an overly aggressive problem like that.

Tom, you may have uncovered the answer to a mystery for which we have searched for many years.  How can one college (HAC) have so many Hackers?  Where do these people come from?  Pastors all over America are sending idiots to HAC to get them out of their church.  What a fantastic idea! 

 

[Fresh Air]

Tom, you may have uncovered the answer to a mystery for which we have searched for many years.  How can one college (HAC) have so many Hackers?  Where do these people come from?  Pastors all over America are sending idiots to HAC to get them out of their church.  What a fantastic idea! 

Didn't you tell me that Joe Boyd visited your church just before your pastor recommended you consider HAC?

<running away>

 

[RAIDER]

Tom, you may have uncovered the answer to a mystery for which we have searched for many years.  How can one college (HAC) have so many Hackers?  Where do these people come from?  Pastors all over America are sending idiots to HAC to get them out of their church.  What a fantastic idea! 

Didn't you tell me that Joe Boyd visited your church just before your pastor recommended you consider HAC?

<running away>

You stinkin' JERK!!!!! 

 

[prophet]

He told us the Monday after spending the week in Cahokia that their pastor needed to convince the guy to go to Bible college. It was how you got rid of an overly aggressive problem like that.

Tom, you may have uncovered the answer to a mystery for which we have searched for many years.  How can one college (HAC) have so many Hackers?  Where do these people come from?  Pastors all over America are sending idiots to HAC to get them out of their church.  What a fantastic idea! 

This ceased to be a mystery, when I came to HAC. 
It was obvious. 
This was a sin against our church.
A bunch of losers sent their problems to Jack Hyles to take care of.
No wonder we had a circus.
Of course, we showed up and put up the tent, and that didnt help.

Anishinaabe

 

[RAIDER]

He told us the Monday after spending the week in Cahokia that their pastor needed to convince the guy to go to Bible college. It was how you got rid of an overly aggressive problem like that.

Tom, you may have uncovered the answer to a mystery for which we have searched for many years.  How can one college (HAC) have so many Hackers?  Where do these people come from?  Pastors all over America are sending idiots to HAC to get them out of their church.  What a fantastic idea! 

This ceased to be a mystery, when I came to HAC. 
It was obvious. 
This was a sin against our church.
A bunch of losers sent their problems to Jack Hyles to take care of.
No wonder we had a circus.
Of course, we showed up and put up the tent, and that didnt help.

Anishinaabe

There were a lot of good, quality students at HAC.  Many churches sent their finest.  On the other hand, there were pastors that thought, "This guy is a little bit out there.  What he needs is Bible college to get him moving in the right direction.  HAC will straighten him out."  I'm not referring to the rebellious crowd.  I'm referring to the "out in left field with no glove" group.  These evolved into the creature we now know as..................a stinkin' Hacker! 

 

[Fresh Air]

Of course, we showed up and put up the tent, and that didnt help.

Anishinaabe

...such a good line I wish I had written it myself.  ;D

 

[prophet]

Of course, we showed up and put up the tent, and that didnt help.

Anishinaabe

...such a good line I wish I had written it myself.  ;D

Who knows, I probably swiped it from you at College.

Anishinaabe

 

[Timotheus]

In those days, the first day at the new church the next week Joe Boyd would deconstruct the church from the previous week, explaining to us the strengths and weaknesses.

So that is where you got your critical attitude from. 

The guys that traveled with Joe Boyd seemed to be a unique bunch.  I always wondered why he didn't travel with his wife.

 

[Binaca Chugger]

In those days, the first day at the new church the next week Joe Boyd would deconstruct the church from the previous week, explaining to us the strengths and weaknesses.

So that is where you got your critical attitude from. 

The guys that traveled with Joe Boyd seemed to be a unique bunch.  I always wondered why he didn't travel with his wife.

Don't you remember?  Joe Boyd left his wife and family for the ministry.  He was always promoted as a hero for this.  "You men go do the will of God and let your wicked jezebel of a wife learn that life alone from the will of God is lonely and broke.  She will fall in line and submit to you!"

We were taught to put ministry way ahead of family.  We grew up with our dads obeying the command to live in such a way.  We faltered, most of the HBers fled Christianity.  We tried living the same way, only to find ruin in our own homes.  As we grew and learned and actually read the Bible for ourselves, we discovered Eph 5 and started loving our families before ministry.  For this, our fathers shame us.

 

[Binaca Chugger]

Got a little personal there, didn't I?

 

[brainisengaged]

Got a little personal there, didn't I?

Yes, but hopefully it was cathartic!

 

[Smellin Coffee]

One day while working the midnight shift at the police department, there was quite a snowfall happening about 2 am one morning. Not really to blizzard proportions but coming down quite heavy, nonetheless.

I remember being bored out of my skull when I got a call from Sauzer's Waffle House about some lunatic standing literally in the intersection of US 30 & US 41 waving something. I sent the officer to check it out and sure enough, it was a HACker (initials W.P. but NOT the man affectionately known as "Wingo") standing literally under the lights in the middle of the intersection, in a short sleeved shirt, a Bible in one hand and a broom in the other and he was street preaching. Literally. No traffic, just preaching away right where traffic could slide and hit the poor guy. The officer ran his report to see if he was wanted (he was clean) and then gave him a ride back to Baptist City. Never did find out what he needed the broom for...

 

[Smellin Coffee]

One of my dad's favorites.

My dad was the foreman for the campus Grounds Department for many years. In the late 70s, he had a guy working under him whose name was Jim L.* Jim could (and would) sleep anywhere he could. One day my dad gave him a roller and a paint can and told him to paint the fences on either side of the tennis court. About an hour later, he went into the Grounds garage and looked over to the courts and saw Jim lying on the ground underneath his ladder. My dad went over to him and sure enough, he was asleep.

My dad woke him up and told him he needed to get to work. Dad was doing whatever in the garage and a while later looked back out there and low and behold, saw Jim literally draped over the top of the fence. When he got over there, Jim had taken one of the drop cloths, folded it up and flipped it on the fence and was literally sleeping with his head and torso on one side, legs on the other. Dead asleep.

Gosh, there were some characters that went there...

 

[patriotic]

One day while working the midnight shift at the police department, there was quite a snowfall happening about 2 am one morning. Not really to blizzard proportions but coming down quite heavy, nonetheless.

I remember being bored out of my skull when I got a call from Sauzer's Waffle House about some lunatic standing literally in the intersection of US 30 & US 41 waving something. I sent the officer to check it out and sure enough, it was a HACker (initials W.P. but NOT the man affectionately known as "Wingo") standing literally under the lights in the middle of the intersection, in a short sleeved shirt, a Bible in one hand and a broom in the other and he was street preaching. Literally. No traffic, just preaching away right where traffic could slide and hit the poor guy. The officer ran his report to see if he was wanted (he was clean) and then gave him a ride back to Baptist City. Never did find out what he needed the broom for...

Not the same initials - and probably before the incident mentioned above - but it reminds me of another character.

One year my room was the end room of Jones 3.  (We had windows on 3 sides of our room with a perfect view of the lake.)  Our room's door was perfectly at the end of the hallway so that we walked right into our room without having to turn to one side or the other. 

One of my roommates and I were entering the dorm together and we saw an old, worn-out straw broom propped up next to our door.  As we neared it, we saw a note attached with her name in large letters.  Her eyes got really wide, and she whispered, "Is something thinking of me as a witch?"

It so happens her boyfriend had been campused and he came up with all these different items to let her know he "liked" her.  This one - once she opened the note and read it - said, "You really sweep me off my feet!" 

She figured out a way to hang that broom on the wall over her bed.....along with a few other "treasures" he gave her. 

 

[patriotic]

Regarding previous story - another "treasure" he gave her while campused was passed down the entire row of chapel while waiting for the service to start.  She and I were at one end, and we notice a roll of toilet paper being passed from one person to the next, each taking time to read what he wrote on the first couple sheets and snicker. 

"To [her name and a pet nickname he had for her].  You really wipe me out!" 


Serious.  Do you think I could make this story up if I tried?