Ministry vs Family

[JustABigKid]

I was taught growing up that if you spent all your time serving God and loving God then your family would follow. This was to include your money.

Is putting serving God or your family needs Biblical?

 

[christundivided]

I was taught growing up that if you spent all your time serving God and loving God then your family would follow. This was to include your money.

Is putting serving God or your family needs Biblical?

1Ti 5:8  But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.

1Ti 5:16  If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed.

I've seen pastors tell their low income members to tithe instead of helping someone in their family that is in a desperate financial shape. I personally know a day care worker that became very distraught over the situation. This "pastor" didn't even offer to help her father who had become very sick. She didn't have the money to tithe and help him at the same time.

Such situation are so WRONG. So silly and in direct contradiction to what the apostle taught and believed.

 

[Castor Muscular]

I was taught growing up that if you spent all your time serving God and loving God then your family would follow. This was to include your money.

Is putting serving God or your family needs Biblical?

I was taught growing up that if you leave sugar out on the table long enough, it will turn into worms.

 

[rsc2a]

[quote author=Castor Muscular]I was taught growing up that if you leave sugar out on the table long enough, it will turn into worms.[/quote]

That's not true?

 

[Sherryh]

I would never put my family second.... God ordained the family before service to God... we are blessed with many that  grew up in church... my pastor has raised 3 boys all are wonderful men...

 

[lnf]

Back when my father died in 2000, my husband and I promised my widowed mother that she would never want for any need.

Even though I am now also a widow, I hold to the same promise to my mother.  She will never want for any need.  Granted, I may not be able to pay for a cruise vacation for her, but I can make sure that a maid will come twice a month to do the heavy cleaning since she broke her ankle and is no longer able to keep her own house...

...and it hasn't happened thus far, but if that promise cuts into my tithe (which I personally believe in), then so be it.   

 

[Biker]

The only possible way to serve God is by putting your family first

 

[Just me]

I was taught growing up that if you spent all your time serving God and loving God then your family would follow. This was to include your money.

Is putting serving God or your family needs Biblical?

Where you grew up you had many examples of the staffs mixed up priorities .  Those being preacher first, ministry second family third.

 

[North]

I have seen too many families sacrificed on the altar of the ministry. There needs to be a balance. It should never be ministry "versus" the family.

 

[sword]

Some fundamental leaders of this generation have put their ministries first and we have seen the result in their children. I think the key is to include your family in your ministry (at every age) and practice balance. Balance is the key in so many areas of life.

The idea of forsaking all for your ministry does not turn out so well. God expects us to pay our bills, train our children,  love & support our families, care for those in need, as well as serve him.

Many of the famous fundamentalist who traveled the nation speaking did so at the sake of their families. When God calls a man into his service, he does not expect him to sacrifice his family in the process. Putting God first includes taking care of your family.

 

[Smellin Coffee]

Jesus:

If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.

...everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or lands, for my name's sake, will receive a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.

I will concede however that participating in a "ministry" is not necessarily the same thing as following Jesus or being His disciple.

 

[Just Ben]

I have asked several of my close friends who are also pastors, "What would you change if you could go back in your ministry and do things differently." Each one replied, "I would spend more time with my family."

 

[PappaBear]

It is an error in the teaching of most Bible colleges that makes "the ministry" a specialized role different from that of others.  A pastor who is a father has much the same issues to deal with in his teenage son as does a plumber with his.

Considering the Biblical qualifications of church leaders, and the consistent "whole family" approach to ministry given in Ephesians 4 & 5 and also Colossians 3 (members + husbands + wives + children + servants), it is sage wisdom that my ordaining pastor gave me when he said:

If you lose your family, you have lost your ministry!

Churches are composed of family members.  Each has a different blend of gifts and responsibilities.  If you weaken the family by emphasizing some role disproportionally to another, then you weaken the local church.  It is the Ruckman, Sword of the Lord, and HAC wings of fundamentalists whose disregard for that one principle has hurt so very many churches.  God is not in such dire need of leaders that He must endure an Eli as priest when he will not control his sons.  So it is that a multiply divorced Ruckman who cannot learn to honor the wife of his youth or a Hyles powerless to control his profligate son is not so necessary to fundamentalism or any ministry that God cannot raise up a more worthy replacement.

 

[ALAYMAN]

I totally agree that a person's family ought to be a tremendous priority in their relationship sphere, but, I've heard many stories of missionaries of yesteryear who left their family(s) to sacrifice for the cause of Christ.  Paul said that he wished all people were like him (not entangles with the needs of family) and zealous for the gospel of Christ, but in that context he acknowledges the need of family.  Everybody is not cut out for single-life and the ministry that might accompany that greater potential.  In the end, it is a personal decision, but if one elects <honorably> for marriage then they ought to see that their family is not neglected as they pursue their vocation, and their ministry(s).

 

[JrChurch]

May I suggest that those of us who are not in leadership (ministerial) positions should help our pastors by caring for their families.  If they have small children, offer to watch them once in a while.  Take a meal by the house when someone isn't feeling well.  Call (ok, text) the pastor's wife when you have planned a trip to the store to see if you can pick up something for them.  Slip the kids some spending money when they are going on vacation.  If the pastor is busy greeting folks, notice where the kids are and listen to them for a few minutes.  They like to chat, too. 

 

[North]

Jesus:

If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.

...everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or lands, for my name's sake, will receive a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.

I will concede however that participating in a "ministry" is not necessarily the same thing as following Jesus or being His disciple.

There needs to be more of a recognition and promotion of the ministry of the working man. Soul winning is our commission, living godly and growing in grace is our calling, but our ministry to God is our employment. Whether as a pastor, waitress, mechanic or homemaker.

Here's a good Bible study that will get you thinking:
What are the possible heavenly rewards for the Christian men and women who work a secular job or are stay at home mothers vs full time Christian workers?